>just went to the orthopedics, he welcomed me with his warm doctorly smile … sent me for an x-ray. i kept my fingers and slightly swollen toes crossed for hopeful results. the machined creaked under its ancient weight … whirred for a while and hopefully captured the image of my broken and may be mending bone! the technician looked happy with the result. the doctor looked even happier with it. he said, “oh, ok now you can start walking, right here, right now” as he looked at the x-ray plate as though he was savouring a moment of victory. “your leg is healing very well” I looked on doubtfully …. healing? what healing? and if so, what do i do with this dastardly plaster cast? He looked at me with pity in his eyes : “I am afraid, that will stay for 3 more weeks” Ashok gasped, “3 more months”? “No, no, 3 weeks; 3 months will stiffen the ankle”.
>hope returns just when you give up on it
>here i have been feeling very low and depressed … for no particular reason really … just the mornings are so dreary and tiring … and i never was like that. my mornings were almost always nice and cheerful. then i reminded myself that every day waking up means i have to depend upon others for small movements and worse still, i can not do half the things i used to do. asked A what makes him so happy … he said he was the “happy sort” … hmm .. then he thought some more and said what makes him happy is that he feels free to be able to do what he feels like, does not have any worry or load on him ….. i asked myself how come i do not feel the same way … what makes me feel so weighed down? Have I lost the ability to feel good or hopeful about life itself? then i
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