>somebody came over today to spend some time and talk about herself. She had been wanting to do this for sometime now and today she did find the time to come over. She said she was feeling confused about herself and her relationship and did not know what was she looking for. I listened to her as she continued to talk about her doubts, her confusions, her questions, her thoughts about herself and her world.
I offered some thoughts, shared snippets of my life and relationships and suggested that may be there are many ways to look at the same thing and to examine the parameters she was using to look at her relationship and herself.
She talked some more, in a shy kind of way, eyes darting here and there, smiling a little, hesitating a little, feeling doubtful of how much would any one want to hear about herself, but really wishing to say more than she already had. I kept wondering whether i was coming across more as an affectionate mother figure rather than a friend.
She then stayed back and shared some more – things that she was afraid of, was ashamed of and was afraid of being ridiculed by others – things that seemed perfectly normal to me but obviously it was not all that normal to her.
then she left – quite peaceful and happy.
In the evening i get txt messages from her complaining about her lover – that apparently he has been saying all kinds of things about me having confused her and how angry was she feeling about all these.
i would not know how to react or whether to feel angry or sad. actually i feel nothing of that sort …. except to look at the world of lovers and relationships – of fights and make ups, of desire and longing, of hate and venom, of indifference and silence, of love and passion ….
where is the place for any third person here?