>Amazing women in my life (part 3) – the story of J


>J was born into a trading community in undivided Bengal.  She grew up with a unstable mother, a nervous father and five or six siblings.  As was the custom in her community, she was married off quite early to a man twelve years older to her in the same community.  Barely did she attain puberty, she was pregnant with a child and from this point on, her life took an altogether different turn.  Her mother and her husband both died suddenly in an attack of small pox, which those days was endemic; J flabbergasted by this turn of events, lost her mind and was locked up in a room probably under advice from the local medico. She gave birth to her daughter but could not look after the daughter due to her illness and her mother in law looked after the infant. It is not known to me for how long J lived in that hazy, misty world of hers, for

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>self absorption – the favourite game


> One of the thoughts that I have been with in the recent past is the thought of self obsession (and I am a master at it 🙂 .  Self obsession is quite a funny thing, it creates a make believe world which tells you all kinds of things about yourself, good, bad and ugly, but the one thing that remains constant is the delusion that you are the centre of the universe not only for yourself but also for others. One of the ways this delusion works with us is in creating our image of ourselves in myriad shades and hues.   One such image is that no matter how much love or affirmation or assurance we receive, there remains a nagging doubt that we were not really welcome into this world either at the time of conception, or birth or to the people we were born.  Obviously this image is totally subjective;  there can not be any argument about this

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