when two people start feeling bitter towards each other, any interaction between them can be so tiring, so loathsome and so depleting. one or both start feeling mean, enraged, cruel and punishing towards each other. such emptiness… If i were to look back in my childhood, bitterness has been a constant companion in my surrounding … it has accompanied most people in their lives through their daily chores, mundane conversation, feelings towards each other. little moments of relief came when i heard a tinkling of laughter from someone when she laughed at little nothing, when i walked on the afternoon-empty corridor imagining that i was actually walking on the sky as it reflected on the mirror held in my hand, when baritone voices came through the ancient radio kept in the corner of the big hall carrying the emotions of a lover unwittingly leaving his lady love, on the Friday night weekly radio play …. those moments were like
Author: Sarbari
The beginning …….
It has never been easy for me to turn around and leave … just like that …just leave … never been able to do that… always had the last minute pull to stay, to restore, to comfort, the maddeningly foolish belief that ‘everything will ultimately work out right’ … that i was not looking at it properly, that if only i could do things differently, things would be OK. well, i am not calling myself foolish … that would be even more foolish 🙂 but the realisation is that underneath all those thoughts and feelings, did lay one thing, that is my belief that i could do anything under the sun and that (this is even more hilarious) i was strong. and who does not know that strong people stay strong, no matter what. so, i went through life being strong. when i was a child and was being beaten up for little nothings by my aunt and my cousin
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